By Royane Real

Have you ever heard that first impressions are important when you first meet somebody?  You might wonder why first impressions are so important when we might be meeting those people many more times.  Don’t we have more chances to undo all the bad impressions later on?  Isn’t it really unfair that the first meeting we have with somebody seems to matter so much?

The reason why first impressions are so important is because humans are tremendously judgmental.  Even when we don’t realize what we are doing, our minds are constantly evaluating everything around us.  We decide, I like this, but I don’t like that.  I like this person, I don’t like that person.  This person seems nice.  That person seems conceited.  This person reminds me of my friend Susan.  That person reminds me of that bad boss I had.

Very often our first meeting produces an emotional reaction.  Humans want to know whether the person they have just met is a potential friend or a potential foe. 

We look for every clue we can find during our initial meeting as we try to decide whether to let this person into our lives.  Often we have a strong emotional reaction that tells us whether or not we feel comfortable with this person.  We may instantly decide whether we want to spend more time with them, or whether we want to avoid them in the future.

Our first impressions and our judgments about other people might be right or they might be wrong, but we rarely change them once they are made.  We always feel as if our gut reaction to other people is justified. 

We know how strong our emotional reaction is to other people, but we often forget that other people are also having strong emotional reactions to meeting us for the first time.  If someone decides they don’t like us after knowing us for seven seconds, they may never change their minds, no matter how nice we are to them later.

Those few first seconds when we first meet somebody are very important to the rest of the relationship we will have with that person.  We often make up our minds about whether or not we like someone in the first few seconds that we meet them.

What are some things you can do to help to create a good first impression on people when you meet them?  Start first with the visual impression you are making. 

Whether or not you can spend a lot of money on clothes, you can still make sure that your clothes are clean and attractive.  Be sure that your body language is open and not closed.  Look at the person you are meeting and show your genuine interest in meeting them.  You don’t need to try too hard to impress others.  These efforts often backfire.  Just be genuine and polite.

Bad first impressions don’t always last, but they are very, very hard to change.  The best way to avoid having to overcome a bad first impression is to make a good impression in the first place.

The above article was written by friendship expert Royane Real - Author of Your Guide to Finding Friends, Making Friends and Keeping Friends

Read about this book below:

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Learn to Be Popular - even if You're Shy and Lonely!

By Royane Real

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Make Yourself Unforgettable

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By Dale Carnegie Training

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